Robert J. (Cap) Fry
25 (more or less) Things about Cap Fry
1. I shouldn’t get credit for this one because Mark Fischer already used it, but yes, Mark and I were each other’s best man.
2. I have a BS in Mechanical Engineering from MSU, thanks largely subjects like English, Latin, Economics, and American History. I also have an MSA degree from CMU. I didn’t get the masters until the early 1990’s when I was working and living in an apartment in the Detroit area during the week. Going to school at night seemed a safer option than the alternative forms of evening entertainment.
3. I originally went to UM to become an Orthopedic Surgeon. Among the myriad of hurdles I encountered: I couldn’t pass chemistry and I couldn’t stand the sight of blood. How I got to be a Mechanical Engineer is convoluted. How I got to MSU is simple – my mother told me to get serious, get my fanny down there, and not to come back until I’d found a wife.
4. After retirement, and after a 32 year hiatus, I decided to take up golf again so that I didn’t become a nuisance around the house.
Sensing that getting to 25 may be challenging:
5. I have never been anywhere on the ground in Idaho or South Dakota.
6. I have never been anywhere on the ground in Arkansas or Missouri.
7. I have never been anywhere on the ground in New Mexico or Delaware.
8. I’m a really slow reader. I’d like to finish “Wealth of Nations,” but after a year and a half I was only on page 79 - only 1016 more to go. I settled for P. J. O’Rourke’s synopsis instead.
9. I suspect I’ve been on the ground in West Virginia, but I don’t remember for sure.
10. I have never been anywhere on the ground in Alaska.
11. Since April 12, I have played 1,405 holes of golf this year. I won’t explain how I know since I don’t figure anyone wants to argue.
12. I have never been anywhere on the ground in Vermont or New Hampshire.
13. I have never been anywhere on the ground in Hawaii.
14. I have stayed at a Holiday Inn Express. I suspect that explains how I know you shouldn’t be living or wandering around on a volcano.
15. Right out of college I worked for the Navy Dept. for four years. We had to go to San Diego a lot, so it obviously stands to reason that I’ve been on the ground in Tijuana a couple times. I never bought a watch nor did I see the … oh, never mind.
16. I think I’d really like to go to Bermuda someday, but I guess there really isn’t much to do in Bermuda other than relax and drink. I’m not as young as I used to be so maybe I’ll just keep wearing their shorts instead.
17. While on a road trip to Madison, WI with Doug Wilson, I met Oscar Meyer. So, if I shake your hand at the reunion, and tell you you’re shaking the hand that shook the hand of Oscar Meyer, you’ll know why. (With tidbits like that, I’m beginning to smell 25).
18. I ultimately I did find a wife at MSU. I still have that same wife. We have a son, two daughters, three granddaughters, and two grandsons. My wife’s name is Jane, which is merely coincidental to the fact that Johnny Weissmuller actually swam in the pool my maternal grandparents had on their farm in Frankenmuth.
19. When our youngest daughter was married, the church organ was under restoration. All the pipes were in crates. I figured I knew where we could get some pipes. We had bagpipes. I got to choose all the music, instrumentation, and choreograph things. Harpsichord, piano, cello, and bagpipes; what a combination.
20. From 1981 through 1985 I raced an old Lola formula Ford - a great way to go broke. I got so serious one year that I actually took up jogging to increase my endurance on hot summer days. Anyway, now all I have is an attic full of pewter mugs that I figure cost me about $1250 a piece. Crazy – probably that’s why it appealed to me.
21. I’ve never in my life touched a snake. Back in 5th grade someone brought one to show and tell. The teacher wanted everyone to touch it. Brenda (Collins) and I were the last two holdouts. Brenda finally relented; I never did.
22. North School had like cork floors in the classrooms. In first grade you had to sit on the floor in a little reading circle. For amusement I liked to reach between my folded legs and use my fingernails to dig little mini-craters in the floor. Once, the teacher asked me if I had to go to the bathroom. To be clear, I have never held myself in that particular place for that particular purpose.
23. I no longer bite horses. Once I was saddling a horse and he bit me. My hands were busy tugging on the girth, so I had no recourse other than to bite him back. During the ensuing acceleration, the irritated animal stomped on my right foot and nearly pulled my front teeth from my head. As an aside, I once stuck one of my grandmother’s hairpins into an electrical outlet. I don’t do that anymore either.
24. Twice, Jane and I have gone to visit Mark and Nancy Fischer on their spread in Montana. The girls like to go into town and shop at the trading post. Mark and I just sit in these two matching comfy chairs in front of the TV. We sip cocktails and practice remembering things (for when we get really old). Practice makes perfect – unless you’re talking golf.
25. Last fall, getting tests done for clearance to have back surgery, I found out I had lung cancer. So, December through March I had bunches of radiation and chemotherapy. I guess I tolerated it better than most, but come April I really couldn’t walk far enough for golf. So, I forked over the money for the unlimited cart usage “Deal.” Obviously, I needed to keep records of how much I golfed to see if I broke even on the “Deal.” Now you know how I know how many holes I’ve played this year.
TA-DAAAH!
26. So, if I just golf, golf, golf in the summer, what do I do in winter? I hibernate, gain 15 or more pounds, and sometimes work on freshening up a room in the house.
27. We hardly ever go to a movie. I’m exceedingly proud of my inability to name or recognize any movie personalities.
28. I detest flying.
29. I’d rather fly than take one bite of calves’ liver.
30. I’m really bad at remembering names. Now I have this dumb job to merge together everyone’s yearbook photo with their name so the computer will print out finished name tags. Go figure.
31. It took just less than 5 months of marriage before all my checkbook privileges were rescinded. I’m not allowed near it. I guess that’s punishment for depositing paychecks and not writing the amount in the register. Now I have this dumb job of being the treasurer for the reunion. Go figure some more.
32. If I never get to go to Bermuda, I think I’d like to learn to play the bagpipes instead.
33. I don’t recall ever reading a fictional book since they made us read them in school. I am a serious and totally humorless individual. Well, I don’t mean to say I’m as humorless as like a physicist or, heaven forbid, an accountant. I probably just mean plain, everyday, run-of-the-mill, normal humorless.
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